On Playing the Lying Card

General Michael Flynn

Aloha.

They fired Gen. Flynn because he was caught lying?

When the report of the personnel change in the White House reached me in Hawaii, I thought it must have been fake news.

I couldn’t believe it.

This is an administration that rose to the top on the ability to be “less forthcoming,” militaryspeak for lying, as Gen. Flynn explained his reason for jumping or being pushed from the seat of power in the National Security Council. So ironic.

One would think they would have promoted him to a higher pay grade for demonstrating his loyalty to the president’s code of veracity.

As I look out on the calm blue green waters off the island of Maui, hoping to spot a whale or two doing their somersault tricks, I kept wondering about the crime for which the general was made to walk the plank.

The most trusted name in fake news, the Washington Post, reported he was caught talking to the Russians on the phone before Election Day.

It wasn’t clear what he was talking about.

It could have been the chatty general was telling his Russian phone buddy to bet all his rubles on the Falcons beating the Patriots in the Super Bowl. New England can’t deflate footballs, anymore.

I’m still waiting for “All the Fake News That’s Fit to Print”, the New York Times, to publish transcripts of the phone conversations our fake intelligence agencies are sitting on. It could be the first volume of the Trumpian “Pentagon Papers.”

Whatever the crime, I assume the man is guilty, until proven innocent, a form of jurisprudence I learned from watching cable TV news.

And I’m not surprised the Rooskies had gotten a man inside the president’s inner circle, given the president’s broromance with Vlad the Impaler. There are more friends of Russia in the Trump inner circle these days, I am gathering from the fake news reports, than in the Kremlin.

You may remember I was the first to call the Republican presidential candidate Donald the Red. But that was back in the earlier days of the campaign when he was talking about the need to rebuild the infrastructure. It sounded like the creeping socialism of that man FDR and his New Deal. Some left-leaning billionaire must have slipped the idea in his hair about how the WPA built all those bridges, highways, dams and airports now falling apart.

I know Donald the Red and Donald the Red is no communist. He wouldn’t know dialectic from a new diuretic or weight loss pill.

This reminds me of something his best friends would not tell him about: Donald you are getting fat. Have you noticed that he never buttons his jackets? If he keeps eating all that fast food, people will start confusing him with his Heaviness, Gov. Christie.

But I digress. At most, Donald Trump is a communist dupe. It’s those other guys around him that I worry about.

They already purged Paul D. Manafort, the first campaign manager for all the wonderful work he did lobbying and running that Ukrainian president’s campaign, the one whose residence makes Donald’s Florida digs look like an outhouse.

The purges in the next few years, like Gen. Flynn falling on his sword, will remind you of the Politburo. Before Putin started poisoning all his potential political rivals, our intelligence agencies needed to study the Politburo photo-op on the Kremlin balcony during the May Day parade to tell who was in or out.

Some people are worried about the Rasputin, Steve Bannon.

Frankly, I’m more worried about the man from the People’s Republic of Exxon Mobil, temporarily serving as secretary of state. Comrade Rex T deserves Russia’s highest civilian honor, The Order of Russian Friendship medal with four oil derricks, for his making the oil and gas industry great again.

Some of his best friends are the Russian oligarchs who share the same communist capitalist creed:

Each according to his need; each according to his greed.

Hopefully, the fake news people will give us Tovarich Rex’s “Be My Valentine Day’s” card list.

Forgive me for sounding like a Russophobe. Call me paranoid, but I am more afraid of the Commies being a threat to making our country safe than the huddled wretched masses fleeing five years of Assad’s chemical weapons and Russia bombing hospitals than having a Russo-American Friendship Society cell in the White House.

In the old days, with the Smith Act, Trump and his gang would all be safely locked up in Gitmo by now.

Mahalo.


 

--
Marvin Kitman
Maui, Hawaii
Feb. 16, 2017

Marvin Kitman is the author of “The Making of the Preƒident 1789”, HarperCollins, and in paperback, Grove Press, available at Amazon and quality book-sellers. His other books include “George Washington’s Expense Account” by Gen. George Washington and Marvin Kitman, PFC (Ret.). Google them.