Protestor outside the Bok Center arena in Oklahoma City holding sign reading “Don’t Sacrifice Your Health to Soothe Trump’s Ego”

The rally in Tulsa tonight is an opportunity for the forces of good medicine, as practiced by the Oval Office, to prove that the covid-19 pandemic is an over-grown hoax. Like the Russian thing, the Mueller thing, the Ukrainian thing, the Impeachment thing, climate change and other hoaxes fomented by fake news, it is meant to steal the 2016 election from the man who got the fewest votes.

800,000 ticket requests have been received at Trump campaign headquarters, “the hottest ticket ever,” explained campaign manager Brad Parscale on Twitter, the second most reliable source of information, next to Fix News.

Whatever the number that actually get into the 19,000-seat BOK Center or a 40,000 back-up adjoining arena tonight, it will be a chance for the faithful to hear the Big Cheese in person.

Der Limburger has been a virtual prisoner in the slammer, locked in the White House by this vicious virus that he had diagnosed as the flu. Incarcerated like the rest of us, he has been unable to maintain his good health golfing schedule requiring100 days a year on the links on average, per the fact-checkers, accounting for the poor physical shape displayed at West Point where he almost did a Chevy Chase (aka Gerald Ford) descending the presidential ramp.

The potential 800,000 or 60,000 or whatever number above 10 or 100 previously allowed by the authorities will test the theory that jamming any number of people in a closed area where they can breathe on each other may be dangerous.

The star attraction of the series of projected rallies in the last 120 days until November 3rd (Election Day), a victory tour like Cher’s farewell tour of the 1990s, will not be wearing a mask tonight. In the president’s scientific judgment, only left leaning loser socialists, sleepy Bidenites and other cowards wear masks. Dominant leaders look funny in masks.

But the 20,000, 40,000 or 800,000, whichever number show up will be maintaining safe distancing of six inches or centimeters, according to POTUS official interpretation of the CDC federal guidelines.

Nevertheless, no matter how many guns, concealed and unconcealed, are carried into the rally, no matter how many red MAGA hats are worn, no matter how many Hydroxi pills are popped by the faithful, or taking swigs of favorite household disinfectant, experts are saying there could be a serious spike in virus cases in Oklahoma and neighboring states in Trumpland, especially in the ranks of Republicans

There are some experts who think this rally thing can turn out to be a form of mass suicide, like Jonestown with the Jim Jones leader who has turned the Republican Party into a cult of personality urging his band of 800,000 to take malaria drugs, or disinfectants, choose whatever their poison. Who knows tonight he might announce the discovery of a true silver bullet, swallowing hand sanitizer.

There are others who think its all a Marxist plot. Having put in office the man they consider the Muscovite candidate, the man who seemed capable of softening the traditional Republican Party hardline policies, the man who saw V. Putin and his oligarch cronies as just another band of corrupt capitalists, they are now ready to take control of Kremlin East (the White House)

Nyet. No problemska, whatever happens, as long as they have Moscow Mitch in control of the Senate.

My theory is that Donald Trump is actually a mole, planted in the Republican Party by the dirty tricks division of the Democratic National Committee in belated retribution for Watergate.

They picked the stupidest, incompetent so-called Republican they could find in the race for the roses in 2016. It was a long shot; they never dreamed that the party of Lincoln, Teddy Roosevelt, and Eisenhower would pick a man who is making even W seem better by comparison.

Will the Tulsa 20,000, 60,000 or 800,000 be today’s Jonestown 909 who took the cyanide? Will Dr. Trump or Dr. Fauci be proven right? Sic transit GOP.


Marvin Kitman,
June 20, 2020

Marvin Kitman is the author of “The Making of the Preƒident 1789.” “George Washington’s Expense Account” by Gen. George Washington and Marvin Kitman PFC (Ret.) was the best-selling expense account in publishing history. His next book, “Gullible's Travels, A Comical History of the Trump Era,” coming from Seven Stories Press later this month, is now available for pre-order.